Tuesday, April 21, 2020

My Grandmother

I know that, during the course of these gratitude posts, I have mentioned my maternal grandmother and the great impact she had on my life. April 21st marks the date of her birth, and today she would have been 107. Amazingly, she was still with us six years ago. Although her health took a steep decline in her last year of life, we all had the joyous privilege of celebrating her 100th birthday with her. 

As with many of these posts there is no way I can truly express all the love, the smiles, the memories, and yes, the gratitude I feel towards Grandma in just a couple of paragraphs. But I would like to just say a few words to honor the woman she was. 

Before sharing my 'list' of thank you's for the precious memories and moments, I would also like to remark how in some ways Grandma was a woman ahead of her time. Her enthusiasm for meeting and embracing people from different cultures resulted in many heartwarming stories, and ultimately a family and network of friends spanning the globe. I see this influence in my own family as I rustle around, sari-clad for an Indian festival, and as I look into my daughter's dark, laughing eyes (oh, how Grandma would have loved her! ).  

Thank you Grandma, for . . .
tasking me with planting all those impatiens around the front of your house. It showed me how a day of hard work can yield beauty for a whole season.
laughing at my silly jokes and numerous voice impressions.
a pantry full of fruit roll-ups and other goodies for hungry kids on our way home from school.
talking to me for hours.
not holding too much of a grudge after 3-year-old me pulled your hair while traveling around Europe in a VW bus.
yanking that plastic bag off my (also 3-year-old) head, even though I cried.
playing 'Mr. Rogers' with me, where we would arduously climb to the top of your stairs and just sit and talk about Mr. Rogers, the king, the tiger, and especially the trolley. (I realize now that you probably had other things to do! πŸ˜€)
telling me about your family; all those stories, whether happy, sad, strange, or funny.
sending me letters, even when I was in graduate school, when I know writing must have been difficult.
your delicious pies and baked beans.
that beautiful pewter pin you gave me with the butterflies on it.
teaching me that it doesn't matter how old you are, you can still be interested and engaged in political knowledge and current affairs.
your love of foxes.
Saturday morning breakfast, enough said.
your beautiful gardens.
your devotion and love for family. 
all those beautiful cards you sent, for almost every occasion I can think of.
coming to my wedding. My dear brother and his lovely wife are the people who made that possible, and despite your difficulties, you made it there. I will never forget the whole family surrounding you as we danced to 'Chaiya, Chaiya' - and you smiling πŸ˜ŠπŸ™ πŸ™Œ
for making a point of telling me about your joy at my imminent arrival into this world; that story warms my heart and has always made me feel so very loved.

Happy Birthday, Grandma- I love you and think of you often as I feel your presence in my life.

*****
This post is part of the Gratitude Practice and post series I began in 2018.

May all beings be happy!



Sunday, April 12, 2020

A choice to make

It has again been a long time since I have written a new post. Again, a lot of things have happened, as might be expected. But with the current COVID-19 crisis and the turmoil and pain it has created for so many people, right now my any offering of gratitude I have in my own life could seem very trite, as if I am oblivious to what is happening in the world today.

This sentiment is magnified 100 fold as my own family also deals with crushing loss. Following the passing of someone very dear to us, we are still reeling. How can I continue to write about the chirping birds, spring flowers and 'the good things in life', when the hearts of my loved ones (and my own) are breaking?

I guess what I am trying to say is, I have a decision to make. Although I have been absent for most of last year, I love writing here at BCB. I have not always shared my thoughts and dreams lately, but it is here that my heart and mind often wander.

The question is though, what exactly should I do now? When I first started this blog in 2010, I wanted it to add value to other people's lives by opening their eyes to Buddhism from an 'outsider's' perspective. After an emotionally tumultuous beginning to parenthood, I began a written gratitude practice in 2018. This added value to my life and changed my perspective in a major way. I would also like to think that it has added value to the lives of others as they deal with their own problems and frustrations.

Right now, at the precipice of this choice, I have several options. From the least to the most drastic: I can stay the course with my current gratitude practice, revert more directly to the original purpose of BCB, change course in terms of topic and scope of this blog, or let go of it entirely.

Right now I really am completely unsure about what to do. I know that I do not need to make my decision right now, but if my ever-helpful (and ever-forgiving) readers could offer any advice, now would be the time. _/\_
*****
May all beings be happy!


   

Sunday, October 20, 2019

Where have I been?!

Well, I have pretty much stayed put, but certainly not been writing here at BCB. It was an incredibly busy summer. But I am ready to get back to it!

In addition to finding a great part-time teaching job (grateful), there was a lot to keep me occupied. My husband had some significant health issues around the same time a close relative came to stay with us for a few weeks. Fortunately my husband is much better now (grateful, and knock on wood) and things have calmed down a little (grateful!). 

Another major development I also wanted to share was a serious uptick in my decluttering journey. Over the summer I participated in a 12-week online course called 'Uncluttered', developed by Joshua Becker of 'Becoming Minimalist' and others. Although I consider myself organized, our home is small at around 1100 square feet, with little storage. This, combined with a significant amount of clutter, was a constant source of stress and frustration.

I am not exaggerating when I say that being part of 'Uncluttered' was/is life changing. 

I am also not exaggerating that on top of teaching and being a mom, the course was a LOT of work, and really felt like a 3rd job/responsibility. But, if it could be considered another 'job,' it is one that comes with a big fat bonus of a more spacious and peaceful home. In all, over 20 boxes and 8 bags of 'stuff' have left our space through donation to local charities. Although I am still working on it (the course gives you lifetime membership), our space is now much more pleasant and easy to clean- and I am much calmer. Looking forward to sharing more about this journey with you!

*****
This post a continuation of the gratitude practice I have been working on since the beginning of 2018. Curious? You can read all about it at ByChanceBuddhism!
*****
May all beings be happy! 

Monday, March 18, 2019

Spring peepers

The other night I was walking to my car at a local shopping center, and heard a wonderful sound. Somehow piercing the din of the ever-expanding sub/urban sprawl, my ears were graced by the sound of spring peepers. Known by the scientific name Pseudacris crucifer (subspecies, crucifer) these little frogs are one of the first signs of spring in the eastern US and Canada. And after a long winter (both for us AND for them!) their peeping call from both permanent and ephemeral spring ponds is a welcome sound indeed.

Their sound also has special significance for me. As our grandfather's health declined, my brother recorded the sound of peepers in a nearby pond so that he, though bedridden, could also enjoy their call. My brother sat by his bedside and they listened to the recording together, bringing Grandpa some feelings of peace in the last days of his life. That act of love has always held a special place in my heart and further deepened my respect for my brother. 

So every spring when I hear the peepers, I am reminded not only of the joyous onset of spring, but of an true act of compassion by one of the greatest men in my life. And having loved ones with character like that is truly something to be very grateful for.

Image: Okay, so maybe not an actual
spring peeper, but still quite lovable 😊
*****
This post is part of the gratitude practice I have been working on since the beginning of 2018. Curious? You can read all about it at ByChanceBuddhism!
*****
May all beings be happy!    

Friday, March 8, 2019

Waaaay behind- and grateful for it!

When I compare recent BCB posts to those from a year ago, the similarities are clear. I am still focusing on gratitude, and celebrating the wonderful people, places, events, and things in my life. But now there is also a difference. Compared to last year's abundant posts celebrating the mundane, the profound, and everything in between, my current posts are somewhat less frequent. 

Cue my own mixed feelings on the issue. On one hand I feel a bit of panic that I am not sharing EVERYTHING I am grateful for RIGHT NOW, on the other I am cool with it. So, I think that I am going to err on the side of the 'other hand', because, well, sanity (remember, I am currently escaping the 'pitfalls of perfection'), and also because it is the truth. Sharing my own moments and sentiments of gratitude has become more than I ever could have imagined: in addition to being more in tune with the many, many sources of gratitude in my life, I have also established this feeling of connectedness. 

Like a kindred spirit, I know that you are there to listen to- and to share! - everything WE have to be thankful for, and that feeling is relayed whether I write here or not. In other words, I am very happy to share my gratitude, but I also know that this practice will evolve, and take on different forms, in both my writing and the practice itself. And that is something I am starting to feel really excited about. 

So although feeling so waaaaay behind would definitely phase me in any other area of my life, that is not the case here, because it shows me how very much there is to be grateful for! πŸ’–

Image: Gratitude, past and present, builds on itself

*****
This post is part of the gratitude practice I have been working on since the beginning of 2018. Curious? You can read all about it at ByChanceBuddhism!
*****
May all beings be happy!   

Thursday, March 7, 2019

A creative outlet

A few months back I purchased a plain straw wreath and decorated it with (discounted!) fall bouquet items from JoAnn Fabrics. I also found a cool wreath kit there called 'Blooming Autumn', but the bright pink and green hues didn't really look much like autumn to me. It was then I realized I could use the same wreath for spring by removing the fall decorations and adorning it with the little doodads from the kit. So, naturally, a purchase was made!

Although I love putting up wreaths and other seasonal decorations, we don't really have unlimited space for every season and holiday, so versatility is important. After the autumn finally gave way to winter, I packed the straw wreath away to hibernate for a while. 

After several months, I decided that it was time to give that straw wreath new life (wreath-incarnation?! πŸ˜„). Never mind the fact that spring is probably still several snow squalls and 'cold blasts' away, but now I WILL be prepared with a spring-inspired wreath ! 

So here's to a fun hour spent with a long-awaited project to celebrate an even longer-awaited season. Working on this wreath was a great creative outlet, and something I am grateful for! 

Before: Straw wreath and kit (purchased separately).

After: Finished wreath to celebrate the arrival
of spring (whenever that is! πŸ˜„). 

*****
This post is part of the gratitude practice I have been working on since the beginning of 2018. Curious? You can read all about it at ByChanceBuddhism!
*****
May all beings be happy!   

Friday, March 1, 2019

Great-ful customer service!

About a week ago I was excited to FINALLY receive some items I had ordered online (I do think that the retailer's go-to mode of shipping is literally the 'slow boat from China' πŸ˜…). The package contained some fun stuff, including bookends for my daughter's room and some very fancy 'home socks' with narwhals on them. The last item was a beautiful jade/forest green shirt, which, after having gotten lost between UPS and USPS last time I ordered it (don't worry, my money was refunded), I was also very happy to receive. However, when I took the shirt out of its packaging I found that it REEKED of cigarette smoke. 

In addition to being a little grossed out, I wondered, if the shirt was not a return, how someone could be allowed to smoke in a facility where they package these things?! I couldn't help thinking about a warehouse filled with workers and (likely flammable) clothes and people carelessly milling about with lit cigarettes in their hands. (Aside from that thought: I should petition to be Smokey the Bear's sidekick if this whole teaching gig doesn't work out).

Anyway, after being busy with other things for a few days, I finally got around to calling the company. The person who answered my call was SO understanding, and actually REFUNDED my money! I was so surprised, because my main purpose for calling was really to let them know about a possible QC and/or safety issue, not to get my money back for an item that was otherwise perfectly fine. But of course, I certainly won't complain, and am grateful for the unexpected refund.  

So, to that kind associate working long days on the phone in customer service (wherever you are!), I thank you! πŸ˜„

Image: It looks a little lighter here, but this is the shirt I received.
I can't wait to wear it outside the house!
 
*****
This post is part of the gratitude practice I have been working on since the beginning of 2018. Curious? You can read all about it at ByChanceBuddhism!
*****
May all beings be happy!